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Sunday, February 17, 2008

Aretha Franklin Tina Turner Beyonce Knowles Non-Controversy Henry G. Speaks

Henry Gandolph here. I have something to say in reference to the non-controversy coming out of the last Grammy Awards celebration.It has been widely reported and commented on by Lotty Dotty and everybody how Aretha "The Queen Of Soul" was dissed when Matthew Knowles'daughter and Shawn Carter's (Jay-Z's) inamorata introduced Tina Turner as "the queen" during a segment of the program last weekend.

Clearly, even Stevie Wonder can see, this is a publicity stunt to get everybody talking about two older female pop music divas and one contemporary pop music divette. It's working.

There are those who say Aretha "THE QUEEN OF SOUL" Franklin's reaction to the introduction by Beyonce of Tina Turner call her "the queen" at the show is proof positive Franklin believes she has ownership of the description "THE QUEEN", as they heard it delivered by Knowles.

I say if Amazon.com. GOOGLE and countless other business entities can be serious about laying patents, copywrite and trademark claims on things that until the latter part of the last century were not able to be claimed then Queen Ree-Ree should be able to stake her claim on the terms "THE QUEEN", and "THE QUEEN OF SOUL". These terms would become interchangeable with her name.

A member of our staff suggested we might retire titles, as numbers are retired in various sports. This same staffer suggests Tina Turner accept the title "THE QUEEN OF SOLE", which might lead her into a new career as a fishwife or fishmonger.

If Aretha successfully applied for private limited use of the terms we may be forced to change some phrases commonly used in our language such as:

    I was pampered at the spa. They treated me like ARETHA for a day.
    Let's take the children down to the Dairy ARETHA for some ice cream.
    My husband and I really enjoy our new ARETHA size canopy bed.
    Our parents were fortunate to book passage on the ARETHA Elizabeth II oceanliner for their anniversary.
    My husband and his brothers always treat my mother-in-law like the ARETHA bee.
    In that historic chess game Fisher put his opponent in check with his ARETHA.
    My bridge partner made a brilliant move when he played the ARETHA to trump and win.
    Everyone dismissed Bob because they see him as being such an old ARETHA.
The difficulty with all this is soon someone will get it all mixed up with Uretha.

I'm Henry Gandolph, and you are not.

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